crimpy

The Three Tortoises

Three tortoises, Russell, Steve and Dave, decide to go on a picnic. So
Dave packs the picnic basket with beer and sandwiches. The trouble is
the picnic site is ten miles away so it takes them ten days to get
there. When they get there Dave unpacks the food and beer.

"OK Russ give me the bottle opener."

"I didn't bring it," says Russ. "I thought you packed it."

Dave gets worried, He turns to Steve, "Did you bring the bottle
opener?"


Naturally Steve didn't bring it. So they're stuck ten miles from home
without a bottle opener. Dave and Steve beg Russ to go back for it.
But he refuses as he says they will eat all the sandwiches.

After two hours, and after they have sworn on their tortoise lives
that they will not eat the sandwiches, he finally agrees. So Russ sets
off down the road at a steady pace.

Twenty days pass and he still isn't back and Dave and Steve are
starving, but a promise is a promise.

Another five days and he still isn't back, but a promise is a promise.

Finally they can't take it any longer so they take out a sandwich
each, and just as they are about to eat it, Russell pops up from
behind a rock and shouts........


"I KNEW IT!!. ..... ...You c&@%*..................I'M NOT F**KING GOING!"