wrong address‏

metal mickey · 20-05-2008, 15:34

The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife goodbye and said, "Well, I'm off now. The man should be here soon."
Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to make a sale. "Good morning, Ma'am", he said, "I've come to..." "Oh, no need to explain," Mrs. Smith cut in, embarrassed, "I've been expecting you."
"Have you really?" said the photographer. "Well, that's good. Did you know babies are my specialty?" "Well that's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat".
After a moment she asked, blushing, "Well, where do we start?" "Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed. And sometimes the living room floor is fun. You can really spread out there."
"Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work out for Harry and me!" "Well, Ma'am, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results." "My, that's a lot!", gasped Mrs. Smith. "Ma'am, in my line of work a man has to take his time. I'd love to be In and out in five minutes, but I'm sure you'd be disappointed with that." "Don't I know it," said Mrs. Smith quietly.
The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures. "This was done on the top of a bus," he said. "Oh, my word!" Mrs. Smith exclaimed, grasping at her throat. "And these twins turned out exceptionally well - when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with." "She was difficult?" asked Mrs. Smith.
"Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to the park to get the job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep to get a good look". "Four and five deep?" said Mrs. Smith, her eyes wide with amazement.
"Yes", the photographer replied. "And for more than three hours, too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling - I could hardly concentrate, and when darkness approached I had to rush my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just had to pack it all in."
Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "Do you mean they actually chewed on your, uh... equipment?" "It's true, Ma'am, yes. Well, if you're ready, I'll set-up my tripod and we can get to work right away." "Tripod?" "Oh yes, Ma'am. I need to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big to be held in the hand very long."

BeautUtes

Cowgirl Ally · 20-05-2008, 15:39

ohhhh

Ha Ha Ha lol lol lol ha ha ha

lukey99 · 24-05-2008, 22:37

haha nice

Burgs · 25-05-2008, 13:22

good one again Ron

BeautUtes

20-05-2008, 15:34	#1 (permalink)
metal mickey Status: CRAZY AND MAD LOL Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: rum capital of australia Posts: 2,357 Rep Power: 6	wrong address‏ The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife goodbye and said, "Well, I'm off now. The man should be here soon." Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to make a sale. "Good morning, Ma'am", he said, "I've come to..." "Oh, no need to explain," Mrs. Smith cut in, embarrassed, "I've been expecting you." "Have you really?" said the photographer. "Well, that's good. Did you know babies are my specialty?" "Well that's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat". After a moment she asked, blushing, "Well, where do we start?" "Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed. And sometimes the living room floor is fun. You can really spread out there." "Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work out for Harry and me!" "Well, Ma'am, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results." "My, that's a lot!", gasped Mrs. Smith. "Ma'am, in my line of work a man has to take his time. I'd love to be In and out in five minutes, but I'm sure you'd be disappointed with that." "Don't I know it," said Mrs. Smith quietly. The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures. "This was done on the top of a bus," he said. "Oh, my word!" Mrs. Smith exclaimed, grasping at her throat. "And these twins turned out exceptionally well - when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with." "She was difficult?" asked Mrs. Smith. "Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to the park to get the job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep to get a good look". "Four and five deep?" said Mrs. Smith, her eyes wide with amazement. "Yes", the photographer replied. "And for more than three hours, too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling - I could hardly concentrate, and when darkness approached I had to rush my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just had to pack it all in." Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "Do you mean they actually chewed on your, uh... equipment?" "It's true, Ma'am, yes. Well, if you're ready, I'll set-up my tripod and we can get to work right away." "Tripod?" "Oh yes, Ma'am. I need to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big to be held in the hand very long." __________________ RUM SO MUCH MORE THAN A BREAKFAST FOOD

20-05-2008, 15:39	#2 (permalink)
Cowgirl Ally Status: Beaut Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Back home in good old Mildura!!! Posts: 297 Rep Power: 1	Re: wrong address‏ ohhhh Ha Ha Ha lol lol lol ha ha ha __________________ YA GET THAT ON BIG JOBS! IT WASEN'T ME!!!! NA IT WAS ME!!!! I Dont Get Drunk, Just Socially Excited!!!!!!!!! ROUGH AROUND THE EDGES!!!

24-05-2008, 22:37	#3 (permalink)
lukey99 Status: Newbie Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Diamond Creek Posts: 37 Rep Power: 0	Re: wrong address‏ haha nice

25-05-2008, 13:22	#4 (permalink)
Burgs Status: Beaut Member Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: Narangba Posts: 575 Rep Power: 2	Re: wrong address‏ good one again Ron __________________ You can ride a horse to water but you cant drive a UTE to petrol when shes empty

Similar Threads
Thread	Thread Starter	Forum	Replies	Last Post
What's wrong with Johnny	XXXXlander	Have a Whinge	9	20-09-2007 22:23
Wrong Bitch!!	Tweetie	Funny Jokes from the Web!	8	15-06-2007 19:01

	Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)